I have a friend in hospice who is likely to pass soon. She is a wonderful friend and has gone through a lot in the last few years. We often spoke of fears and difficulties with each other. I went to visit her the other day, for perhaps the final time. She sat upright and spoke softly. Her eyes were distant, but she was fully present. I fought tears as I sat with her, as she ask for healing touch to ease her pain. I held her hands and looked at her and ask, "are you afraid?" She looked at me and replied, " Sometimes I feel a deep calm." As our conversation progressed and I cried, she remained calm and consoled me as I spoke about having difficulties letting go of her flesh, of her in the here and now where we could touch and talk. She listened so peacefully. When I went to go she held my hands tighter. I said I didn't want to overstay. She didn't say anything, so I sat and we spoke quietly for some time. Then she gave me the greatest gift, she told me to keep doing what I was doing, with my kids, my family and my yoga students. She told me I had given her so much and yet I felt she was the one who had given -- her love, her money, her time, her spirit, her life. When I finally prepared to go I told her, "this is not good-bye, it's just see you in another place." She smiled a warm and loving smile. She hugged me and kissed me. Then I left. For a brief moment I was sad because I knew I would probably not see her again in this life. After a moment, though, I began to feel wonderful. My friend and I left nothing left unsaid. No loose ends, no regrets between us, no anger, no pain. It was love I felt. Although I knew I would miss her body I also know death would free her from her pain, allow her to grow and be the bigger spirit she is. I knew she would be okay as she crossed over to that other space. I knew her strength was enough, her love enough. I'll miss her, but I know she is always with me in my heart. I know I'll see her again.
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Hi, I'm Andrea. This is my yoga blog.